As many parents would be experiencing right now in Australia, I am just so tired.
The very long summer holidays in Australia are taking their toll on me.
I have been very fortunate to have Scott home with us a lot of the time but this past week has been very difficult.
I have been extremely spoilt over the last 11 months.
5 days a week I have had time to myself (well some weeks).
I did not sit and watch television but I had time to think, do, create and replenish in silence.
In my effort to go to the bank today and then drive to another destination to return some unwanted goods I realised (again) how difficult this simple task is for us.
Wheelchair, assistance in and out of the car......just to do a 5 minute task at each place.
Assistance eating, dressing, toileting and moving anywhere is draining.
The constant need to be near me, hold my hand, cuddle or just "talk" is wonderful....... but there is no break.
I am tired.
Amelia means the world to me but I have also learnt to appreciate her special school even more now.
I can understand right now why parents need a break.
My appreciation and admiration of single parents with special needs children has grown immensly.
Tom has been a wonderful help on so many occasions (apologies to the stuck up ladies at "Adairs" that Tom was wheeling her around your store while mummy looked at things) but he has also had many "moments" of ......... well frustration and arguments from my end.
Do not get me wrong.
We have had glorious holidays and I have treasured every minute of our time together.
I am just worn out.
Tomorrow Amelia and I leave to stay at Very Special Kids.
(It is Take 2 after last time).
Tom and Scott will be having valuable time together at home.
I have packed books, DVD's, magazines and Amelia's computer.
My accomodation is 1 minute away from Amelia's.
Chadstone Shopping Centre is just up the road and lots of resturaunts in easy walking distance.
I hope to repeat my mantra many times and remind myself of it's meaning before we come home.
"Instead of trying to find shelter from the storm...........learn how to dance in the rain".
The words are perfect for us.
I am just so tired.......