Friday, 30 September 2011

Disneyland - 6 sleeps.

I need time to sit here and process.

I apologise (and welcome) to all the new people who will be observing this blog but I promise there will be a lot of photo's next week.
But for now , and in the past 10 months , I need to analyse and summarise.
It clears my head.

December 2010 - we were told Amelia had a disease. She was going to deteriorate and die early. "Go home and treasure everyday" the Royal Children's Hospital told us.
January 2011 - Amelia's Project was established by many, many friends.
Not by me but appreciated by Scott and I.
Febuary 2011 - Amazing, special experiences were being organised for us, meals being cooked for us and overwhelming support for us.
March 2011 - First AT clinic in Brisbane where we learnt there is a small amount of hope for Amelia's future.
June 2011 - The first "Amelia's Night" was held at Frankston RSL and raised $52,000.
5 x more than any of us thought was possible.

Goal of taking Amelia to "the most magical place on earth" was achieved.

In 6 sleeps we leave.

Now an amazing group of tradesmen have approached us to remodel our bathrooms, for Amelia, while we are gone.
We just pay for the new vanities, shower heads etc.

Pack for Disneyland.
Choose everything for bathrooms.
Get house ready.
Get our pets organised.

At the moment I am very overwhelmed and stressed.

Today we received a package containing, a letter, a card and activity books for the kids.
It was from another AT family in Adelaide.
It made me stop.
It made me think.
It made me cry.

The kindness of someone else in the same situation grounded me.
Reminded me of what is important.

I have a massive shield of people around me.
I know it is for all of us, but right now I am sitting and feeling it for me.

I am the one who gets up and looks after and organises everyone.
I am the one who planned the holiday and where we are staying.
And I am the one who needs to pack everything.

The strong force behind me, helping me to do all of this is Amelia's Project.

Amelia and Tom are all smiles at the moment.
Amelia in particular is full of happiness and energy.
I have not seen her like this for 12 months.

My dilemma at the moment is that I can feel GREAT emotion coming.
When Amelia started school, Scott had to take both kids out for the day two days before she began.
I had been feeling the same as I do now but on that particular day, I began obsessively cleaning........and crying. No sobbing.
The build up, the anticipation and the wait was all too much.

I can feel the same thing happening now.

Tonight I will leave you all with a link to a song that I cannot stop listening to at the moment.
The words mean so much and I find it almost.......Haunting.
It is so true in so many ways.

Please copy (right hand click on mouse), move mouse to top space bar naming current website, and paste (right hand click on mouse) into your browser at the very top to get THIS website above.

Love to you all


Thursday, 29 September 2011

Mr Stress

I have a new little creature sitting next to me at the moment.
Some of you may remember Mr Depression.......
this one I am calling Mr Stress.

For the time being I have been able to eradicate Mr Depression but Mr Stress is now waiting to jump on board.

There are many things on my "list" to buy and pack.
I have not started any of it yet.

Between choosing and buying bathroom items (to totally remodel 2 bathrooms), emptying out Scott's wardrobe (that he is going to lose) and clearing out the bathrooms......there is not much time for anything else.

I have children, I have a house to keep organised, meals need to be cooked, washing needs to be organised and both kids have had their friends sleep over (3 times!).

Haircuts are needed, animals need a vet check up, waxing (so Amanda no longer looks like a man) and Chelsea Park on Sunday.

I WILL get it all done, but at what cost to my sanity ?!
I REFUSE to let Mr Stress jump on board.
I can feel him pushing on my forehead but I continue to imagine it being kept at arms length.

Anyway must go now.
Scott is ringing asking me to finalise bathroom tasks, haircuts occur in 30 minutes and then I getting a tutorial on a new program for my computer (which will be very handy while we are away!).

My brother just texted me to say "I might come for dinner tonight".
My response "Oh will you now ??!!".
Just add it to everything else today.

But I will leave you with a conversation Tom had with his sleepover friend yesterday.......
A: Are you going to the Melbourne Show?
T: No, cause we are going to Disneyland.
A: Well don't go there. Stay at my house and then you can come to the show with me.
T: Oh I can't. I have already got my passport.

The mind of a 5 year old !!!!