I have been struggling about what to write on here recently.
So many events, conversations and realisations that it has been difficult to comprehend how I could possibly put it all into words.
My struggle has been about "what to do" with my children on their very long six week holiday.
I have mentioned Mildura and Very Special Kids house...............
BUT it is the "normal" activities that I have REALLY struggled greatly with.
Swimming?.........great but it exhausts Amelia to the point she cannot talk or walk.
Beach?............after our horrible experience last year (where I could not get her across the sand back to the car) is not to be considered.
Art/sculpture park walk?............ground too uneven for Amelia's wheelchair.
Carnivals/waterparks?..............Amelia is either unable to participate or the sights and sounds are too overwhelming for her.
Amelia likes to sit at home or go shopping.
Most places around us are not wheelchair friendly.
She does not like too much stimulation, noise, people or lights.
Very difficult to try and plan six weeks for Amelia and one very active 6 year old child.
To Tom's credit, he does not demand entertainment.
He has learnt to entertain himself.
I just want to offer and provide what other children are able to experience.
I openly admit, I have really struggled these holidays.
My usual positive and happy self has struggled to appear.
I just want to have the option to take my children wherever I want.
A park is quite often not an option anymore.
Amelia complains the whole time we are there about being "bored".
Of course she is bored !!!!
What can she do?
Play on the climbing equipment and run around with her friends?
With Tom getting older and Amelia deteriorating even more......
It is difficult.
Next week both children begin their new school year.
For the first time in many years, I cannot wait.
Tom will have mental and physical stimulation for many hours.
Amelia will have the same but in an environment "perfect" for her.
I do not feel that I have done a very good job the past six weeks.
I have struggled.