Rollercoaster and Change!

This past week has been a very BIG week.
Both emotionally and physically I have personally found it very draining.
But it has also been a time of many emotions, a lot of them positive.

 Tom started school for the first time EVER.
Amelia started another school year which included attending a special school 2 days a week (her choice). And I have had my first taste of having both children at school .....and me at home.

 Tom has taken to school, so far, better than any of us imagined.
On Friday he walked up to me disappointed after leaving his classroom.
"Why do we have to have weekends??" he asked sadly !!!
He comes home very excited every day to not only tell me every detail of his day but to also excitedly tell me about "who got in trouble".
 He always ends this particular conversation with "and it wasn't me!!".
Then he excitedly wants a high five !!!
(Scott and I may have been seen high fiving each other and shouting woo hoo).

 On Friday Tom came home with a very special notice explaining that he has been chosen to be the "Energy Ranger" monitor for his class.
This means he has to check lights, computers and electronic devices are on/off during the day.
 The role is perfect for Tom who thrives on responsibilty.
The presentation of his badge will be at assembly next week.

 Amelia is happy.
She is tired at the end of each day BUT she is happy.
Normally I pick her up and it breaks my heart to see her so exhausted.
 This week she survived almost 4.5 days.
That is excellent for first week back. T
he excitement of new class, new teacher, seeing her friends again and having Tom at her "mainstream" school has really lifted her spirits.

She also came home one day very excited that she had "won" a MacDonalds toy in a playground game.
A group of girls were also very excited that she had "answered the question in the game correctly".
Those children will never understand the happiness Amelia felt in being included so beautifully but I was able to enjoy her excitement when she came home.

There were mornings of "guilt" on my behalf.
Where I felt guilty that I should not be leaving her at school today.
But I hoped that the school would call me when she was struggling......and they did.
 If she is unable to function or just feels crap, I want her home with me.
 Not feeling like she has to keep pushing herself to continue.

 Her first two days at Special School was a success.
She really enjoyed it.
I cannot possibly explain how friendly and welcoming all of the staff and children are.
 She will be getting physio, OT and speech during her 2 days there.
And swimming (that is why she just HAS to go Tuesdays!).
 Last week she participated in homecrafts (tye dying a piece of silk) and this week Music Therapy.

 Scott is emotional that Amelia chose to colour her silk red and blue. She told him she is making something "just for him in his favorite footy team colours".

 This weekend I started Amelia on a high vitamin/mineral/protein drink for energy.
Thank you to everyone that suggested this to me.
Hopefully it will help her replace all of the energy she burns doing ANYTHING.

 And me?
I really struggled this week with many emotions.
No children at home to talk and play with.
No children at home to keep safely in my care.
 The guilt of being at home while knowing Scott was having a very difficult week at work.
The guilt of Amelia attending school while tired.

 So I cooked really yummy dinners and snacks.
I kept the house spotlessly tidy.
I ran errands I should have done weeks ago.

 But I never sat down.
Not once.
The rest of my family couldn't ....... so I shouldn't.

 Scott and I had a very productive talk on Friday night.
He disputed all of my thoughts and worries and once again showed his support for what I do and have done.

During the week I was able to attend a "parent helpers" meeting at the school.
Enrolments are lower this year for prep than previous years.
One lady , new to the school, addressed the issue of talking to prospective parents.
She suggested NOT mentioning the acceptance of special needs children.
She felt that parents are turned away with this statement and may think that "these" children get more attention than everyone else.

 I do not need to explain how this statement made me feel.

 But upon reflection I am very happy with my analysis of this statement. If prospective parents are "turned away" by this "acceptance" then I am very grateful.

 Out of 500 children at our school there are 21 funded special needs children.
There are probably another 21 unfunded (thank you to our government and special needs acceptance committee).

 My special needs daughter needs to be surrounded by people who embrace her disabilty both physically and emotionally.
Children AND adults.

Narrow minded, discriminatory and judgemental people can go to another school.
 I am glad that our school "weeds out" those who do not accept all children.

 My child has staff members hired to care for her "special needs".
She does not take away teacher attention from anyone else.

 So I am overall very happy with the people who do choose to send their children to our school that accepts children with special needs.

 But I feel sorry for these children who are sent elsewhere because of the "special needs children".

 They will never get to see what these children CAN do, rather than what they cannot.
They will never learn to accept others and not judge someone immediately.

 They will never create a friendship with someone who could teach them SO much.

 xxx