For as long as I can remember I like to keep "busy".
Whether it is socialising, shopping, helping others, tidying OR cleaning out my house.....
It is good for my psych.
It makes me feel worthy.
It makes me feel worthy to myself.
I have always suffered from low self esteem and self worth.
If I clean and have a healthy friendship base around me then I feel happy.
That has not changed in recent times.
I may have changed my focus recently though.
If Amelia has only one life....then so do I.
My jobs, chores, obligations and pressure on myself now includes a new element.
The pressure of daily life now includes MY television shows, MY movies and My books.
Something I have never allowed myself time for.
Imagine my disappointment when I look back at my previous life as a teacher with no children.
School holidays were spent "busy".
Is washing cars, cleaning house and stressing about "anything and everything" really worth it ?
So as a person that has never had much interest in the previous mentioned, I proudly declare my love to take time for all things ME..........
(even if the **"RED ROOM OF PAIN" would never be something I would want to enter!!)
** 50 shades of Grey BOOK>
(highly recommend xxx)